There are moments in life we would rather forget. Those embarassing slip-ups that remind us we are all human. Then we have those times that once the cat is out of the bag, it's difficult, if not impossible to reign it in.
I remember a news conference in Singapore with the London 2012 people. They all seemed to be amiable folks, joking and laughing amongst themselves. Tessa Jowell was on the far left.
As things progressed I sensed that she was "disconnected" from the rest of the group. As if she really didn't want to be there, like there was something else going on that no one knew about. She had the look on her face of "this is the last place I want to be right now."
She only answered a few questions. Maybe two or three. I had a question in regards to what London 2012 would do to ensure equal employment opportunity for all applicansts, especially those outside of the EU. My demeanor and facial expression meant business.
There was a bit of short discussion as to who should take the question and in the end Tessa took it, with a short two or three sentence answer. I got a look at her eyes---and right at that moment I knew I had made a mistake. Progressivly thruout the conference, she became more and more disconnected, until the point she answered my question, and the answer had nothing to do with what I asked, but it didn't matter.
I have a pretty strong second sense. My impression is that the rest of London 2012 was subtly "goading" her to take the question. Sort of a verbal being-beaten-up-on-the-playground thing. Right then I had a huge lump in my throat and I wanted to say "but I really didn't mean it that way!" but the damage was already done.
Later on, after I got home, it emerged that Tessa was going thru some major personal and professional issues. If I could have gone up to her and given her a hug, I would have (but that would have been highly unprofessional.)
It's been my one big regret-ever since. You can't take certain moments back (both good or bad.)
But the one thing you can do is make things right.
And Tessa, I apologise.
Contributing to someone's broken spirit is never right, no matter what the situation.
I hope you forgive me, because right now I can't forgive myself.
